Never discourage anyone...who continually makes progress, no matter how slow.~Pluto
It has been quite a century since I've last updated this blog.. or any other blogs that I have. Sometimes it makes me wonder why I even have so many blogs when I don't even have the tiniest inkling of updating even one. Well, from my personal observation of .. myself, I have discovered that this happens all the time mainly because of the anti-social word, "Imperfection". It is not rare for me to suddenly think of a crazily creative idea of some sorts which is worth mentioning to the world, but before I could even take up the pen (or touch the keyboard), I got nudged. Not by the ever famous MSN nudge, mind you. But by a biological nudge that injects the guilt of imperfection into my very veins- in seriously large doses! My hands, as if programmed, stop me from making a fool out of myself by writing something which is not even tiny-bee-wit close to perfection. Nothing is better than imperfection.Talk about being a perfectionist!
A few days ago, while trying to doze off in the car on my way to Pahang, I happen to have nothing better to do, so my mind just drifted off to some thoughts to occupy the slowly passing time (FIY it was burning hot at that time!). It kind of amazes me how my unconscious mind specifically chose the topic "Simulated Teaching" when that is exactly the issue I have been avoiding for a long long time. Trust me when I repeated long. I wanted to write a perfect piece on my ST experience. If you have read any of the other posts concerning ST, you will know what I mean. Everyone has their unique experience on that course. To top that, they beautifully pointed out each and every moment of their ST experience in their own personal spaces. I didn't have that 'gift'. All I can be proud of is my short-term memory loss. The last time I met MR Lim at the 'bengkel', he asked me what I have learned from his class. I could only stare blankly at him. If there is even any blur cases in this world, I'm the most blur of them all. Everyone has their precious dignity. So, to protect mine, I have ruled out every chances of announcing myself as an imperfect blogger to the rest of the blogging community out there.
What I did not have the wisdom to realize earlier is the most crucial lesson I have learned from the ST course. It wasn't whether I was creative enough to create the most interesting set induction. It also wasn't whether I have the guts enough to try out a grammar activity to link the set induction to the 'while' stage through the 'pre' stage (although we spent a lot of time doing just that). Nor was it whether I was smart enough to carry out a 'while' activity which fits perfectly into the remaining time left after deducting the time allocated for the set induction, 'pre' and 'post' stages. I do not deny that all of the above are crucial for a real class, but they are not the most significant lesson I have learned from the ST course.
The most important lesson I have learned from all these lies in the word "Imperfection". Every week throughout the course, we kept on rushing (like hell) to try to impress our lecturer with the best lesson we could think of. It wasn't easy trying to stay up to the standard. We watched some being praised, while the others fell short of the expected glory. I wasn't exempted from the latter too. Many of us consciously or unconsciously broke down because of the imperfection that we assumed to be entitled to us. We started to feel nervous about the ugly monster in us, the monster which was threatening to break out into the world to show just how weak we were. Of that, I wasn't exempted from either. To be honest, I am a human being. And at large, I am a future teacher. As the saying goes, "Most (if not all) of the teachers are perfectionists" (if you are wondering where I quoted that from, I made it up). Week by week, we were given comments on the lessons we have conducted. There was never a comment perfect to the ears.
I would not have realized this important lesson I was talking about if I had not been blogging here. Unlike my ST classes, I have sooooo few comments here. Does it mean that my posts are too perfect for people to comment on? I don't think so. What I actually believe is that a lot of people just don't care enough to leave a line or two. So, what am I doing, complaining of the many comments I got from the ST course? "Check your grammar", "You are not teaching the language through this activity" and "This activity is very boring" are actually pointing out to me that I have not stopped learning. Yes, I am imperfect, but I am not lying dormant on the ground, wasting my life away. This imperfection has actually become my motivation for more progress. What better ways are there for me to see this imperfection than through the eyes of my lecturer and peers? Like our wise lecturer once said, "Teachers don't know everything". If everyone of us is perfect, what is left for us to learn from each other? Therefore, let this lesson of imperfection be a reminder for us to not stop encouraging each other as we step into the journey of teaching practice. Bon Voyage my friends!
xoxo YingoYing
A few days ago, while trying to doze off in the car on my way to Pahang, I happen to have nothing better to do, so my mind just drifted off to some thoughts to occupy the slowly passing time (FIY it was burning hot at that time!). It kind of amazes me how my unconscious mind specifically chose the topic "Simulated Teaching" when that is exactly the issue I have been avoiding for a long long time. Trust me when I repeated long. I wanted to write a perfect piece on my ST experience. If you have read any of the other posts concerning ST, you will know what I mean. Everyone has their unique experience on that course. To top that, they beautifully pointed out each and every moment of their ST experience in their own personal spaces. I didn't have that 'gift'. All I can be proud of is my short-term memory loss. The last time I met MR Lim at the 'bengkel', he asked me what I have learned from his class. I could only stare blankly at him. If there is even any blur cases in this world, I'm the most blur of them all. Everyone has their precious dignity. So, to protect mine, I have ruled out every chances of announcing myself as an imperfect blogger to the rest of the blogging community out there.
What I did not have the wisdom to realize earlier is the most crucial lesson I have learned from the ST course. It wasn't whether I was creative enough to create the most interesting set induction. It also wasn't whether I have the guts enough to try out a grammar activity to link the set induction to the 'while' stage through the 'pre' stage (although we spent a lot of time doing just that). Nor was it whether I was smart enough to carry out a 'while' activity which fits perfectly into the remaining time left after deducting the time allocated for the set induction, 'pre' and 'post' stages. I do not deny that all of the above are crucial for a real class, but they are not the most significant lesson I have learned from the ST course.
The most important lesson I have learned from all these lies in the word "Imperfection". Every week throughout the course, we kept on rushing (like hell) to try to impress our lecturer with the best lesson we could think of. It wasn't easy trying to stay up to the standard. We watched some being praised, while the others fell short of the expected glory. I wasn't exempted from the latter too. Many of us consciously or unconsciously broke down because of the imperfection that we assumed to be entitled to us. We started to feel nervous about the ugly monster in us, the monster which was threatening to break out into the world to show just how weak we were. Of that, I wasn't exempted from either. To be honest, I am a human being. And at large, I am a future teacher. As the saying goes, "Most (if not all) of the teachers are perfectionists" (if you are wondering where I quoted that from, I made it up). Week by week, we were given comments on the lessons we have conducted. There was never a comment perfect to the ears.
I would not have realized this important lesson I was talking about if I had not been blogging here. Unlike my ST classes, I have sooooo few comments here. Does it mean that my posts are too perfect for people to comment on? I don't think so. What I actually believe is that a lot of people just don't care enough to leave a line or two. So, what am I doing, complaining of the many comments I got from the ST course? "Check your grammar", "You are not teaching the language through this activity" and "This activity is very boring" are actually pointing out to me that I have not stopped learning. Yes, I am imperfect, but I am not lying dormant on the ground, wasting my life away. This imperfection has actually become my motivation for more progress. What better ways are there for me to see this imperfection than through the eyes of my lecturer and peers? Like our wise lecturer once said, "Teachers don't know everything". If everyone of us is perfect, what is left for us to learn from each other? Therefore, let this lesson of imperfection be a reminder for us to not stop encouraging each other as we step into the journey of teaching practice. Bon Voyage my friends!
xoxo YingoYing
